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That's Sports

by T.R. FAHY

-- Ever wonder what a pro golfer does for recreation when he quits working and retires?

-- Penguins' Brooks Orpik's funniest heckler: "Your dog is supposed to lick your face, not chew on it" ... The NHL suspended Predator Jordin Tootoo five games for knocking Stars' Stephane Robidas unconscious. Wasn't the suspension a little tootoo short?

-- Been so cold up north, it's a wonder the Cubs haven't gone into hibernation ... People are pushing for more blacks in baseball--why not lobby for more whites in basketball? ... Mike Hampton is the worst Braves signing since the Indians unloaded Manhattan for 24 bucks ... Twins are building a bike trail under their new ballpark ... MLB pitcher Ugueth Urbina, currently up on murder charges, has now gone from the bullpen to the pen ... Had Pete Rose bet $1,000 on the Reds to win every game he managed, he would have wound up $39,000 ahead ... In 2000, Angels pitcher Jarrod Washburn strolled into the clubhouse with a 9-foot-tall ostrich. Pitcher Ramon Ortez panicked and backed into the locker, screaming, "My God, look at the big chicken!" ... 2006 MLB league champions St. Louis and Detroit also finished 1-2 on the list of most dangerous U.S. cities.

-- According to Sissy Scharf, Ireland is the country that drinks the most milk, Mexico the most Coca-Cola.

-- Wide receiver Randy Moss recently asked O.J. to pose for a picture at the night club, Prime 112. Nice to see Simpson taking a well-earned break from his ongoing exhaustive search for the real killer ... The next Vince Young, high school junior Terrelle Pryor, 6'6, 220 lbs., of Jeannette, Pa., and the #1 recruit of 2008, rushed for 1,675 yards and passed for 1,795 yards last year ... Ravens new running back Willis McGahee must be playing for the game of love--three paternity suits in two years.

-- Favorite Women's March Madness name: Temple's center, Lady Comfort ... Isn't it amazing how CBS can work 40 minutes of hoops into three-plus hours of commercials? CBS--Commercial Broadcasting System! ... Did you know Gator swingman Corey Brewer took his lucky teddy bear, "Pudding", to the Final 4? Teammate Taurean Green also owns a stuffed bear, "Bubba". "Mine wears boxers," he quipped ... Doesn't Florida's coach Billy Donovan look a little like Eddie Munster?

-- In closing, Dr. Dave Petrik asks why did the physicist break up with the biologist? Answer: There was no chemistry between them.

(Some of the information in this column was obtained from other news organizations)

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