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That's Sports

by T.R. FAHY

-- Rumor: The South African Vuvuzela (horn) Philharmonic was angered by soccer games breaking out during concerts ... What did this month's World Cup, NBA Finals and Tony Awards have in common? They were all rewarded for "great acting" ... Imagine what would happen if an NFL referee threw a flag to nullify a go-ahead touchdown in the Super Bowl, then gets on the mic and announces, "I will not elaborate. Play on!" World Cup corrupt officiating needs help ... When England's goalie allowed a soft goal on the U.S., it was the worst thing to happen to the English since BP and Boy George ... An online retailer is advertising a 2010 World Cup themed "stab resistent" vest with a patch touting your favorite team. Priceless!

-- BP's marketing ploy: "With every 100,000 gallons of oil that leak, you get a free NFL glass" ... Seahawks' million dollar rookie wide receiver Golden Tate was caught by police munching pastry inside a doughnut shop after hours. Which explains the glazed look in his eyes ... Jailbird O.J. Simpson applied for work-release just so he could help running back Reggie Bush find the real USC program-killers. The NCAA investigation started in 2006 and lasted longer than the Civil War.

-- According to Laurie Peacock, the kori bustard is the heaviest flying bird alive today (45 pounds on average, found in Africa).

-- The Lakers missed 68 percent of their shots and still won Game 7. Were they playing with one of those erratic-flying World Cup soccer balls? ... The late John Wooden had four undefeated teams among his 10 national hoops championships. Former UCLA coach Jim Harrick: "John had as little ego as anybody I've ever known." There will never be another one!

-- Tiger pitcher Armando Galarrago, who lost a perfect game a while back due to an umpire's poor call and never complained, received a new Corvette and every borderline ball-strike call the rest of his career. He's our choice for sports man of the year ... Cubs manager Lou Piniella has planned to go fishing in the Gulf during the All-Star break. He's going from Sweet Lou to Sweet Goo.

-- Have you observed golfer Ian Poulter's wardrobe? Somewhere in a Motel 6 the drapery is missing ... Golfer Natalie Gulbis and ex-boyfriend Ben Roethlisberger played a round of golf last month. She stayed out of the rough, the sand and the washroom.

-- In closing, Greg Legas asks what has 300 legs and 7 teeth? Answer: The front row at a Willie Nelson concert.

(Some of the information in this column was obtained from other news organizations)

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